Not Always Merry and Bright

Surviving and Thriving During a Not-So-Happy Holiday Season

Despite what social media, entertainment, family, and of course the rampant and unbridled commercialism might lead you to believe, the holiday season can be an acutely painful and difficult time. As much as it can cast everyone in a warm glow of good will, it can likewise throw everything into sharp relief; a time often used for reflection can feel sour and distressing to many people, particularly when the reflection is that of trauma, strained familial relations, or a heightened awareness of disconnection from others.

First, let’s just take a moment to acknowledge that however you feel about the holidays is valid and fair, and moreover, that you are not alone in feeling that way. It is extremely common to feel this way during a time that can seem almost hell-bent on forcing cheer and merriment. I myself often feel the vice grip of the season pressuring me to feel the “right way” during this time; am I celebrating hard enough? Acting cheerful enough? Am I being graceful enough with my family—compassionate enough toward others, forgiving enough of the slights against me because “tis the season”? If that speaks to you, I’d like to remind you that every one of those things can also be applied to you, yourself. Are you celebrating yourself enough? Are you having grace and compassion for yourself? Respecting your own need to be treated gently and with empathy? When the holidays are a difficult time for a variety of reasons, how can you refocus on your own self-care practices, and make self-love the ~reason for the season~?

LAST sex therapist Vanessa Icazbalceta-Soto, LPCC, and sex and relationship coaches Jamie Azar and Kiri White have insights to share, whatever it is you’re sitting with or going through this month—be that loneliness, family strain, or stress of any kind.

At the post in the link below, they’ll talk through a variety of coping mechanisms, strategies, and internal and external actions you can take this holiday season—whether that means getting through it, or thriving through it!

Speaking of which, invasive, judgmental questions and overly familiar relatives are a common hurdle around the holidays. If you’re anything like me, I have in the past felt wildly unprepared for the questions shot my way. Emotionally we may be ready, but sometimes the simple and literal responses do not come to us. So, if you need some lines to keep in your back pocket for the next ~out of pocket~ question you don’t feel comfortable answering, might we suggest:

You can come up with your own tailor-made vague responses, bespoke to you, or a redirect to refocus on the other person. If you’re invested in not rocking the proverbial boat, staying curious and inquisitive about other people may be just the thing.

Finally, another looming specter of the holidays, which can affect anybody regardless of their feelings of the season:

Whatever you’re dealing with, when you ask yourself how am I going to get through the holidays? we hope you can find some comfort or guidance from our experts here. At the link below, you can find the full article, filled with even more advice and strategies from Jamie, Kiri, and Vanessa, as well a festive gift guide for the celebration of YOU!

If you appreciated hearing from our LAST experts and are interested in working with any of them, we offer free, virtual consultations to get started! Click here to reach out to intake and get scheduled today.

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Pleasure Psychology Intimacy Coach Training & Certification

If you, yourself are interested in learning more about becoming an intimacy coach, like Jamie and Kiri, this could be yet another gift to yourself this holiday season. Our Pleasure Psychology programs are designed to take everyone from the newly curious or experienced therapist, all the way to fully certified intimacy and relationship coach, ready to take on clients and run your own business. The liberating gift of being your own boss, and pursuing the meaningful, s3x-positive work you’ve always wanted!

Jamie is herself a graduate of the program—check out what she has to say about us here:

And for a little taste of the topics explored throughout the (completely online) coursework, from LAST founder and Pleasure Psych creator Moushumi Ghose, LMFT:

For more information on the program, including the breakdown of course tiers, retreats, benefits, and pricing, click below:

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Don’t miss out—next episode of #SexyAuthors is UP for your listening pleasure!

In Ep4 of the #SexyAuthors podcast, Mou sits down with Rachel Kramer Bussel, prolific erotica author and editor! Check it out below, and add some books to that wintertime reading list ❄️ 📚 🥵

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